I had this choice group of friends in collage. Ones that did everything together. We studied, hung out, went to dinner, midnight movies, comedy clubs, dancing, football games and basically meandered around aimlessly for hours together. It didn't matter what we were doing as long as we were all doing it together. Watching paint dry... we could make that fun. Anything! It was truly magic. Just enjoying each others company. They visited me and work and I them. We joked and laughed to all hours of the morning. We talked on the phone and goofed off like preschool kids. But it was my social circle and I loved it. They understood me and got me. I understood them and got them. We fought and cried and laughed and played as hard as we could. You know you really grow to love that interaction. Day in day out... 7 days a week we hung out together. We even traveled on a big trip to Vegas! Another cherished moment that will always be near and dear to me.
I still remember like it was yesterday, driving out of the Salt Lake valley leaving with my family moving to Wisconsin. I cried like a baby and had to pull over to get my self together... knowing all the great friends I was leaving behind. It was amazing knowing I needed to leave...to get on with my life, new job and opportunities, but the friends I had, pulled at my heart strings like a magnet. Not in a bad way, but the best of ways. I have always thought I brought out some of the best in my friends. Both near and far I have always wanted to leave a situation better that when I got into it. I loved my friends so much and moving on was hard.
Fast forward to this week.. like I said Facebook has never been a big deal. Its there and I use it a bit but I really never saw the true value till some of my best collage friends popped up. One right after the other....bing, bing, bing they started showing back onto the radar.. First there was one and I asked about others and they said they lost track....rats. Then one morning I wake and ding...gmail calling -- so and so has asked to be your friend in Facebook. "GET OUT!" I yelled, I smiled wide, I screamed inside... I even shed a tear. Its really amazing how this whole circle of life works. Years ago, during some newly found single-life, I took a trip back to Utah to see if I could find these old friends. I went to old jobs and old residences best as I could remember, but they had all moved on. Now certianly I didn't scour the place for them and it turns out that if I has just opened the darn white pages I may have found them... but I made an attempt and left empty handed and heart broken. I moved on. I hate dead ends, I hate goodbyes and I hate leaving words unsaid. I cherish every moment I get with friends and I really hope they get the same out of me, but these were not your run of the mill friends. It was different, so different. Hard to explain, but I'm trying. Not knowing where they are and not knowing they are safe and sound and happy...that was a big deal to me. Were they married, kids, single, jobs, happy, healthy and well...? I'm not sure I understood how great of friends they were.. but I do now.
So I have spent a few long evening chatting online with them. Catching up and showcasing my extended family, my Becky and my Emma and my Madeline, Clara and Tommy. All my pride and joy and what life is worth living for. Its amazing to welcome these friends back into my life. I'm not 100% sure how they will fit, but one thing I do know...Thomas Robert Clifford, Jr's life is so much fuller knowing that these fine folks and people I call friends, are back in touch. Kinda like that blanket we all used to crawl up under while watching movies...there was always room for one more. Its been almost 14 years... I missed so much, for that I'm sorry. Tonight went through some old stuff and found the above picture; See the smiles...genuine and true. Magic! This is the essence of what I have been talking about. Friendship is a 2 way street and for the last years, its only been one way. I didn't hold up my end of the deal. Its truly amazing to know where they are, to know they are safe and to know they are happy. Life is all about being happy, and each and every one of them have brought me so much untold happiness over the years. I wish I could in some small way, return the favor. I have time to figure that part out, but for now I know exactly where they are once I do. I love you all!
Tom,
ReplyDeleteYou Rock! You are one of those people who knows how to make almost everyone you come in contact with feel either completely accepted, deeply cared for or loved. Which of the three depending on what level your friendship is! I can easily see the difficulty you would have when leaving an area. When much is given, much comes back to you,if you stay in one place long enough for it to find it's way back without getting lost!
Mark